The pirates hijacked 3 more ships today!!
we need a boat to join in
Obama is on top of it we'd get killed within mins, but we'd live in legend foreva
don't go back without me... they'll know i'm pooping.
Oprah is sooooo fat. I can't even concentrate on Mackenzie Phillips talking about banging her dad
this kid just offered me adderall in exchange for my meal points. college at its finest
i did make 45 jello shots and that makes me feel more productive then any paper would
In less than 3 minutes we had 3 security guards running after us
welp wont be popping out a kid with a beret. frenchie is gone and the mother nature showed herself. bilingual kid can be erased from the bucket list
Thought it only fitting this Jubilee weekend to snort lines with a 50 note
Your patriotism amazes me, the Queen would be proud!
We'll find out our level of friendship after tonight. You'll be helping me move a body. My body.
Who knows? Maybe we can sing afternoon delight into each other's genitals.
Dude walks in wearing jean shorts and a graphic tshirt and goes home with an attractive female. EXPLAIN YOURSELF UNIVERSE.
he just kept repeating "those were some pretty nipple-y tits" over and over the rest of the night
I want to just live in between your butt cheeks.
I'm twenty nine years old, now is not the time to start trying new drugs. I need a hedge fund...not another drug-induced hangover.
I think I achieved my goal of being high for 24 hours in the same week I promised myself I wouldn't smoke anymore
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