How did you manage that?
Told her it wasn't GENITAL herpes... just ORAL herpes... on my penis
lol... jersey girls rock
I wish "capable of destroying an innocent girl's life" is something I could put on my resume
And the cops told us we were all naked.
Congratulations, you fucked a nickle into me.
Drunk walkin through police station. America
I'm the fucking queen of sexting. I just made a blowjob sound so poetic I'm wishing I were a guy just so I could blow me. Learn from me.
I'm just saying. If this how my magic vagina shows it's magic then I don't want any
Oh! You were the one walking around cradling the bottle of Fireball all night!
I made him leave to get me chicken nuggets so I could have sex with his roommate
I have two choices: tits or tacos. I just can't decide.
So! As of five minutes ago I've officially masturbated in every room in my apartment
Dude, I helped you move in yesterday...
What doesn't this kid understand that our relationship is not going past the blacked out blowjob I gave him on his birthday?
I feel so accomplished. I've cleaned my room, done laundry, called those places, gotten jobs, and masturbated.
I'm so proud of you.
Kinda thinking about going to my moms wedding high
I'm just trying to figure out the reason why humans wear socks....
Randomize
