I think we should go ahead and pin a note to my shirt when we go out that says"do NOT buy me shots"
On the back we can put possible side effects may include: indiscriminate making out, brief crying spells, yelling in jibberish, and sudden sleep.
i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
He went through and tagged himself on my crotch in all of my facebook pics
an ex called crying about her current BF. convo ended in phone sex. i love emotional wrecks
jungle juice + heels + stairs = broken arm
I mean I found and stalk his moms facebook.. that obsessed.
I just found my coat check number in my underwear.
You know were out to late when I call my hook up at 8:08pm and 8:08am in the same night.
Like I said I'm looking on the bright side. The bright side just happens to be filled with penis attached to hot marines
Just found a wrench in the washing machine. Sooo not doing your laundry anymore.
My vagina loves me do-dah do-dah my vagina loves me do-dah do-dah
I picture you throwing your vagina around in the same fashion that they pass out candy at a parade.
Well, I washed his beard with dish soap and then I fucked him three times.
When is the right time to ask your new roommate for her school schedule so she doesn't walk in on you fucking some rando in the kitchen in the middle of the afternoon?
Sooo, did you delete me cause I said I wouldn't babysit you while you did shrooms? You're a grown man.
dude igloo, 4 foot bong, and 3 grams of blue dream. will you be my eskimo buddy?
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