I like how you refer to peeing in the car as "super cute"
My boss just called me into his office to apologize for being an "inadvertant cockblock"
man i wonder what i would be like if i had never started smoking weed
God Help those hot young girls. It's going to be like Bambi in iraq. Except worse.
He also has a monumental penis. It's unbelieveable. I'm sorry but he's perfect.
please dont make me drink to the titanic soundtrack
His IQ level must rival that of a comatosed aardvark.
Way too stoned bro. Was laying down on my back and thought for a good 30 mins what it would be like to be a turtle stuck on its shell
Can't tonight. I'm supposed to get drugs for some college kids. Just doin my part in helping to enlight america's future
There should be an open time period where you show each other your goods and it's totally socially acceptable to bail.
I wholeheartedly concur
my cat just photo bombed my nudie.. does this qualify me as a cat lady?
I sang him a lovely rendition of 'So Long and Thanks For All the Fish", but replaced fish with dick.
I should probably drink beer instead of rum today so I don't end up naked in my living room while I still have guest.
I think I got into an argument with my cat's former owner about what a BDSM relationship entails.
Idk. The bad part of me thinks it's a good idea. The bad part is also the stupid part.
Randomize
