D3 body, D1 cock
who the fuck tagged pancake nipples on my profile picture?
I don't smoke a lot but now and then I do. Weed and I are like still standing naked in a bathroom together deciding if we should blow one another or bolt for the exit. An awkward relationship.
he turned the pretty ricky playlist on. its about to go down.
Just saw a woman in a hospital gown with a Steelers jersey on top smoking a cigarette while hooked up to an IV outside of the hospital. I love Pittsburgh.
Ice that vagina down, get some coffee, and try not to walk with a limp. It's time to dominate, pull it together
may or may not have figured out a way to make my mom a drug mule to bring me ecstasy...
facebook is just a cold reminder of all the times other bitches won my hookups
She bit my shoulder during foreplay last night, and it's already infected. I think she has rabies.
I just put vodka in my apple sauce. Spice up your fucking life.
he threw his shirt and suit jacket out the window of the uber going home
And what in gods fuck were you drinking. It tasted like windex with a mixture of juce
I feel like I may be the only person who can say they crutched their walk of shame. past the secret service.
I woke up spooning with two strangers on Saturday morning... I felt like a sexual sandwich
I mean there are real risks associated with having unprotected sex, but I don’t think I need to worry about a ghost possessing me and having unprotected sex while using my body
Randomize