ill give you a foot job if you come over before 4
adderall just fell out of my nose in class. guy next to me just nodded.
i lnow ive slrrwsdy teted you this. but goddamn girl on tv is a good song
Just mixed vicodin and mucinex. This cold just got fun.
And he probably thinks I'm in love with him but after three shots of Patron you love anything
Finding out he was uncircumcised by feeling his foreskin in my mouth was NOT ideal. New rule. Lights ALWAYS on.
Halfway through lecture, some kid in the front row threw up IN his hands. Professor held the door for him to carry it out.
you guys have a strange definition of the word fun. I would have said dangerous, terrifying, or life-threatening. of course, bowling can now be described the same way.
This time last year, you were undressing me from my gecko costume and getting freaky in a public bathroom. Tough to top that New Years Eve.
So please don't worry, but I need some help getting blood out of my drywall so I can get my security deposit back. I would not ask if the need was not great.
CRAIGSLIST IS NOT THE ANSWER
IM LONELY AND HORNY
Knows all the good gay bars AND has a dog? Wtf can't I drop pizza on guys like that????
So you're not gonna be in town tonight?! Your dick was the light at the end of my academic tunnel!
I had cheese pancakes which is pretty much just melting cheese in a frying pan and then eating it except youre in denial that your life is a wreck
Oh yeah, nothing says welcome home like walking in on your parents having sex on your bed while the dog is watching, they told me to wait until they were done...
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