Having a random hookup so left but love u
As it would turn out, "jesusssssss" is not the password to enter Faith Chapel's wifi network.
Oh I forgot to tell you one of the little boys in my preschool class was wearing a Hooters tank top today.
I bought this skirt with every intention to have it wrapped around my tits by the end of the night. So, I'm not a whore. I'm a self-fulfilling prophecy.
He ended up walking out of his bedroom and told me to look at the nonexistent fire he was holding in his hand. Im upset I didn't take those shrooms.
did i paint my nails blue or do i need to make a trip to the ER?
Woke up under the lifeguard stand sleeping next to mitch our homeless friend. I bartered a summer wardrobe for his last 5 dollar to buy a bfast sandwich. Bring clothes
Also you know what's worse than drunk texting? Drunk leaving soup on your hot neighbor's porch.
Suddenly I feel like all I did this summer was have sex in our apartment
A guy in a banana suit just got the whole bus to participate in a call and response version of Bohemian Rhapsody. HERO
I saw it and almost just was like "Ice breaker: your penis is massive" but I didn't.
I emailed the police apartment to apologize to the officer from last night. I practically threw a hissy fit because he wouldn't hug me.
It was "against protocol"
He referred to our sex as "an Olympic event." My tits are bruised.
Long story short I shit on a sidewalk while walking with multiple people. Then sprinted around the streets of Tallahassee in only gym shorts as I tore my toga off and wore it as a cape.
The air tonight was full of shame when we saw each other.
Well if u wouldn't have had sex on the front porch last night I think that could have been avoided.
Randomize