just wrote on a church. and then stalked a boy, by the way, i fucked him. him being your friend, also, love tacos.
The last thing I remeber was convincing you to hide in the fridge, and then taking everything out and you not fitting.
You tired to make Beefaroni in the Mr. Coffee machine.
We'll see haha. The cum didn't work...I just chewed the whole thing in a day.
I hope you meant gum...
Turning 21 on Saint Patty's day. I like to think this is what my alcoholic ancestors have prepared me for
at russian wedding, no open bar. bottles of vodka at table. getting to work tomorrow may be an issue.
her bridesmaids come in huge, huger, wtf, and free willy. all their gown are strapless. its like watching the Hindenburg waddle down the isle.
i'm going to look back at this as the time of my life when i casually dated that autistic guy
remind me again why lemons and alcohol in the crock pot is a bad idea?
The bosnian sent me a sext with his dick next to a comcast remote. It went up to the "stop" button. Ironic and appropriate. Grab your remote and imagine it.
You've ruined television for me.
It's Friday afternoon and I'm drunk. This is how I cope.
I went around and congratulated every guy that had a beard for having one
Goddamn tequila
My liver just had a heart attack.
Dennis picked up a 50 year old woman. Then he and Dan got in a fight and jumped out of the limo. No one knows what happened to them.
its like probably shouldnt be sending pics of your asshole to strangers who work in the same building as you
Randomize
