the young, male pastor of my church has a jesus fish tramp-stamp. I made him show me.
there were at least 5 of us standing around the bathroom stall cheering you on to throw up.
Correct me if I'm wrong but the photo album titles "cause I've been drankin" and "baby jessica" should not belong to the same person.
Well no need to be a stranger, even if you aren't interested in joining my bisexual polygamist marriage. New city, new friends.
After he was done he gave me a case of landshark and tickets to tomorrows yankee game. This is the best nonrelationship ever
They wouldn't serve more then two Shots per person, so you grabbed a group of strangers and said u werre buying them all shots, then proceeded to drink all of them.
It was great. They teamed up to hit on these two frat boys all night, until the frat boys started making out with each other. The looks on their faces...
IT'S A FUCKING GIANT POKEBALL MAD OUT OF TINY ROSES
well that's what you get for sleeping with a guy called 'the defiler'
Getting high in the car with mom and the aunts during intermission for drag queen bingo. Details later.
I taught a straight girl about grindr today. She showed me tinder. It was like some sexual cultural exchange program
Fucking adderall I just talked at the security guard for 90 minutes
Oh the best part of having sex with him was that he made me a smoothie after
Caitlin, you were laying in your bed feeding your dog ritz chips and singing a whole new world at 4am loud enough your neighbors came over an asked you to stop.
I love my life
She tied me to the bed and did lines off my chest before sex. I’m going to put that on my bucket list just so I can cross it off
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