Why do fat girls all have such cute faces?
God wants them to get laid too.
I learned an important lesson this weekend.... I'm way to good at sex to travel for it. From now on he drives here...
So I feel bad, Ross is asking questions, I think they need to know it's a Spanish lesbian bar
The guy in the next stall screamed courtesy flush and then puked. Bless you Vegas
I wonder what acid is like for a blind person... Can we find this out?
It's a good cause. For your vagina.
I know you`re my best friend, but when i wake up with this bad of a hangover and no memories of last night, i dont want to see your tits ad my background.
I wasn't trying to be rude when I hurriedly walked past you, but I can not put in to words exactly how bad I had to shit.
Woke up in the ER with a nurse holding my tongue together inside of my mouth and a shattered jaw, the last thing I remember is opening the 151, care to fill me in?
I think I've forgotten how to blink. Help plz?
I think one of your friend's offered my friend chicken tenders back at his place...just FYI he should probably come up w/ another line
The date went significantly better after the fifth shot of fireball.
its the pipe that keeps on giving. Just when I think it's done, I scrape just enough. It's a st. Patrick's day miracle!
She puked on the floor because she said she really liked to clean.
I hate being the first one to text him all the time...I feel like Iook desperate to get laid when the reality is that im just really horny and he has a/c...
Randomize
