I want to poop on a bird, just to show them what it's like.
i just rolled a joint on the giving tree. that book has given me so much.
Ok, so for future reference, in Rome, "piano bar" means "brothel".
it's been like two and a half months. And I swear, I keep seeing walking dicks. I think I'm going crazy cause of lack of sex..
Hey did where's my bong?
In the tree out back .... Top branch on the right
Should I bother to ask?
Yea I saw a friend of yours carrying your limp body somewhere
Why yes. I did get laid looking like that. My sheets look like there was a clown orgy
So immediately after we finished having sex she started singing, "The Circle of Life", put her clothes on and then just left. I think I'm in love.
Was I at least a good cuddler? Like at least honorable mention?
I believe in using alcohol to heal from the inside. Not as a topical solution.
There's mini weenies and empanadas everywhere...
You have more time for sex than anyone I know.
Was so high at one point last night that while showering I was worried that using too much hot water would slow down our Internet.
Oh and people at work think i got knocked up so my gay roomie is claiming it as his lol
He was referring to me as "Teenage Dream" the whole night
Randomize
