Someone's got a whale tail
A thong is hangin out?
No, a fatty following them
Have you ever noticed that nowhere is the same thing as now here, i get my best ideas when i smoke
He poured all of the vodka into the sweet tea and said that tomorrow it would be called 'surprise drunk.' then we had sex.
It was almost awkward to look at you naked while listening to Circle of Life. Just saying.
Frozen pudding on a popsicle stick. Bill Cosby would be so proud of drunk me.
you know what would be perfect? if you flew in on a horse/cat holding taco bell and then you swooped me up and took me to disney world and it was magical
I just used a baby fork as a roach clip. I am totally the cool aunt.
Jenna, I'm going to use all my homosexual powers to steal him from you
Austin, I will climb on top of your shoulders and slowly suffocate you with my vagina
He's way too stoned. I took him to el bra and he's laying on the table, not sure what to do with him
Last thing I remember is whiskey shots. My roommate tells me we were there 15min before I decided to run home naked. And we live across from a police station.
I want to be tan and drunk. Is that too much to ask for?
IDK I WAS CAUGHT UP IN THE TEQUILA SHOTS AND FRIENDSHIP
I don't get it. If he broke into Taco Bell at 2 am, then why couldn't he have brought me home a fucking taco???
Facebook just reminded me of the time I found two IHop cheese sticks in my hand bag. Those were the days.
Any luck with the purse?
No, though I did find her weed. Also her sons name is King. I'm uncertain how I feel about that
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