we are all sexual creatures
yea maybe. but you're not. you're not getting any.
yeah. you were just sitting there watching transformers, caressing your toaster.
I really need to stop coming home drunk and lint rolling my rabbit.
Great. I get laid, Leslie Nielsen dies. I can't have have sex anymore, the film community can't take another loss like this.
I want to bury your face in my vagina. Possibly by force. I will try not to suffocate you though.
i was staring at her drunk thinking "shes at least a four"
I let a drunk, gay man in a dragon costume motor-boat me. With his dragon head.
Fuck you. You were a total asshole last night.
We will get to that, but can anybody tell me whose fucking socks I am wearing?!
My farts smell like burning tires and false courage
I'm only gonna ask u this once. Y is there a picture of u only in superman underwear rubbin ur nipple on facebook????
Uh I can actually explain that one..
Just saw a fat guy on a flower print moped. He's my hero.
When i was leaving for work this morning, i realized the neighbor was passed out drunk, with no pants, and a half eaten whopper on my lawn. Knowing that hey..we have all been there before.. i decided to give him a pillow and a blanket rather than wake him up.
If by science you mean beer then YES!!!!
I get so pissed when there is something that NEEDS to be made fun of and you're not here.
Don’t get me wrong—I love silver and bracelets—but handcuffs are not a good look on me…
Randomize
