Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
I totes stole your whore crown.
With great power comes great responsibility.
he asked if he could put his cape on while he was still inside me.
My choices this week make me realize that I need to copyright the term "cock buffet"
I bet his dick wears a tuxedo.
I am very happy to share that the hospital says the testicle pain is normal and that they are going to take care of it.
You know what id love more than anything right now? ..a back rub while eating biscuits and gravy
I feel like a drive thru vagina
I was just thrown into the pool and now I'm surrounded by men... You would think this is the dream but I'm just confused
With gravity the way it is and your butt clearly being the size of a bus you'd break your hip or something
These are the things that make me so grateful... that I slept with your sister instead.
The only reason you haven't shit yourself yet is because you don't like having fun.
Well I had to have sex with him so he would buy me plan b. The fact that I had sex with someone else last night who couldn't afford it is irrelevant.
He showed up with a hearse full of beer and is currently shooting pumpkins with a flare gun. Who gives a shit if he's a furry. We need to party with him more often.
I want you to worship my cock.
That's not how you start a conversation.
Randomize
