i think i'm in class. and blacked out.
I finally got her to squirt but it wasnt a stream, it came out in the form of mist. I felt like I was in rainforest cafe.
It's called 'beer pong' not 'everclear and coke pong' for a reason...
The kid next to me is typing a powerpoint presentation.. title: Reasons to Wear a Condom, subtitle: The Ian Story
The first slide was titled: You Could Get a Girl Pregnant.
i'm getting the "you hooked up with my friends" speech from him. i'm returning with the "gotta keep my quota up" speech
But it's a terrible idea. One erection and it's gonna go wrong
Driving around Panama at 7 am looking for an open liquor store..
I had to have my mom pick me up from the party and the windows lock was on so when I went to projectile vomit out the window it wouldn't roll down and it splashed back at my face.
Im sorry that my initial plan of you grabbing his dick didnt work out but Im glad you grabbed his heart
Bang-toberfest begins!!
I'm confident that their children would come out as 100% authentic rats
do you remember showing me a picture of your husbands penis last night?
yea! the mushroom one. i would only show you.
I went to bed at ten on a Friday night I have virtues to spare
Blacking out is all I've done this year and we're only 3 days in. Checkmate bitch.
Can I borrow a thong? I’m having drinks with a cute boy tonight and I’m out of clean underwear
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