Well listen chief - never again do i want the scenario of going to the ER totally naked and partially drunk to b a possibility.
just saw my sister at the strip club... dont think she's "taking a night class over the summer"
girl has like over 50 stars tattooed on her front, side and back. feels like i just fucked the universe.
She walked into class late sat down for 5 min muttered 'oh i cant do this' and walked out. She looked like death.
We should party with her soon
just a question.. totally understand if you dont know what im talking about.. but.. do you have my funnel? i think i tucked it in to your bed last night.
HOW DID YOU END UP IN THE BATHROOM WITH A DANCER AFTER 12 MINUTES?
well someone pooped in the lint basket in the laundry room last night, but none of us will admit to it so we're all just secretly judging each other and doubting ourselves.
Its a "sake bomb in the bathroom during class" kind of day.
Just ate a gummy bear I found in my sheets. So yeah, 2013 is SO gonna be my year.
A big thanks to that bride-to-be, Her fiance and his loaded friends will forever hold a place in my heart for the generous tequila body shots on the couch at Henry's.
Actually, I take that back. You can only have it if I'm allowed to French braid the mullet.
it's ok my mom asked me why i had a guys shirt on and also why there was chocolate all over my bra
My Dicks been hard all day. Poor guy isn't used to vacation being over
he's such a nice guy...he deserves a bigger dick.
I love how fuckboys immediately become cultured when I tell them I’m an artist.
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