i have yet to find a random guy that would make me want to do any position besides missionary, these are what normal people call "applying standards"
I know ur sleeping, sorry for waking you but i just saw a girl with mittens on using her nose to control her ipod touch
and she said "My body is an orphanage, I take everybody in"...
I just puked in my fish tank. Helloooooo summer.
I decided to have standards now that i've graduated. No guys without a bed frame.
I need to have sex with you on our hotel room window ledge... This is a need not a request.
He sent a pic, I sent one back. Then nothing. It's like we sext-messaged goodbye and ended the relationship.
You never did explain why you were in wal-mart with a wok full of popcorn.
We broke into the space center. If i go to jail I wanted to tell you, you have a fantastic dick. Use it wisely.
Almost there.
define "almost". like I have enough time to watch a youtube video or oh shit, put on some goddamn pants because they're in the driveway.
Just saw identical twins riding scooters. Today is not real who the hell rides a scooter anymore
blew off easter dinner with the fam to go play shot roulette. woke up in nothing but my boxers in the back of a random pickup truck.
I realized it was late, and he was my brother in humanity and another incarnation of my own life force and consciousness, so I regained control of myself, thanked him for helping me, and went home.
It was a glorious ass. He has amazing hands. I want to fuck him until he can't do math anymore.
I'm studying. I have a really exciting life lol
It's hard to say that sarcastically after having sex in a movie theater
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