Dude i fell asleep inside of her
thats awesome
he's going on about how he's going to treat me right and wants to let himself be in love with me and spend a lot of time together. kids these days. like its not about sex anymore. i'm confused.
Just witnessed a fat girl fall off the treadmill, pop a medicine ball, and drink coke out of a water bottle all in one workout.
there's got to be a less slutty way to tell him the baby isn't his
He fell asleep in the strip club and they paid some stripper $20 to sit on his face until he woke up.
Ill bet we could have atleast fucked a girl who fucked a guy who has fucked tara reid. That's a famous circle right?
Sex tent. say it aloud its amazing. promise you we rnt stoned.
So I was thinking for Halloween I'd do Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde....for my vagina.
Shit. She's still hooking up with some random in the doorway. How do I get out of here?
Well hurry! Everybody is already at McDonalds.
I'm free! Didnt realize how easy it was to crawl out the window.
Sometimes turtles just really trip me out man
Stop it. You know what r&b does to my body
Hope everything goes ok. If it makes you feel better, I straightened vomit into my hair and killed a bird earlier.
Now after not puking, next step is not to do the accent when immigration says "hello."
I miss you and I miss your weed. Come home.
I told her I wanted to go swimming and she responded with jello shots, taking off her clothes, and jumping into the pool...I think I'm in love
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