you didnt say anything until i brought it up today. i guess i misjudged your maturity.
I guess I misjudged your gender.
his facebook status quotes britney spears so there is always that
She looked like her face caught fire, and someone put it out with a screwdriver.
Operation Purity has been aborted
we can't become the bulimic house in the complex dude. Besides, you need teeth for your career.
Just convinced airport security that im sober. All i do is win.
he turned two sober chicks into 7 drunken girls...he's my hero
gladiator or hannah montana?
This is why I never have to ask who you are when I get a new phone.
Chilling. The soap was talking at one point if I rememeber right...
my roommates tied me up with rope and duct tape then left me outside the door to the hot girls' suite on my floor, knocked on the door and ran away leaving me there with a sign that says free
Dude it's sisterhood of the traveling wine glasses here
Hun, it's always cinco de Drinko in our family. It's like Groundhog Day. Only with more booze.
Did you survive the Atlanta roadway snowpocalypse?
All the bars are closed. Might as well be dead.
In the last 3 weeks my drunken adventures have caused me to lose 2 credit cards, one debit card, a bracelet, two purses, and my $500 phone... Maybe i should quit drinking.
Like I'll lick your nuts to make you feel better if you don't get it
Listen, you can either give me drugs or an orgasm. You decide.
Randomize
