so that wasnt chicken after all
Woke up at 4:30am to my little brother shaking me. Apparently I fell asleep naked on my kitchen table waiting for the toaster to pop. 2 years of college completed and i still havent learned my drinking limit...
I guess I tried to spit on a homeless man on the walk home...Out. Of.Hand.
I told the girl who was peeing in the garbage can she must have had a lot of upper body strength.
It's like split custody, only he's not a kid and they have sex with him.
He puked, did more shots, and then pissed in a drawer. We thought it was bad enough and all of a sudden...boom-clothes come off and he passes out with slippers and a styrofoam hat on and a guitar hero guitar in hand pretending he was slash.
I guess our biggest consolation is that we haven't woken up in a hottub with a dead dude. Yet.
I know it I should, but it's kinda nice. It's smells like unbridled enthusiasm and copious amounts of melt your face off sex.
I think we need a list of things that are automatic NO's for dating a guy. Married, definitely a no now
i just got referred to as "the Loch Ness Cockster". God bless my Scottish heritage.
I'm pmsing and only have one functional foot
I think we should have a sex position advent calendar
HE PEED ON ME. THE MANAGER OF THE BAR.
Damn him and his beautiful face and body and penis.
she's 6'2. you bet your ass i slept with her.
Randomize
