Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
I felt like Norm from Cheers walking into the free clinic.
we did it on the carpet and she just yells out "OH. MY PSORIASIS".
i just looked at the calendar to see when spring break is and literally stopped eating
What the hell did I do to get youtube to recommend a video for me called "how to increase your chances of getting pregnant"?
She told me she cured her bulemia by popping hydrocodone after she ate. that way she would be rewarded for not puking. I like the way she thinks
Chipotle...archenemy of the gay man. Cockblocking me since 1997
I'm still not completely convinced I'm not pregnant. I just dipped beef jerky in cream cheese frosting.
Oh god I think I promised some guy from high school that I'd be his fuck buddy in like 3 months
the lady next to me just sniffed my hair, smiled, and then fell asleep. I almost started crying from that kind of creepiness
don't cry, we can learn from her
Could someone please explain the rug burn on the right side of my face and do I need a shot of penicillin?
Yea we had fun. Lost my wallet some girl has it. Sarah fell asleep in a cab and ended up at some wawa. It was cray. She's home now
I've never heard "I will drown your mother in vanilla pudding" as an insult before, and then last night happened.
Tomorrow's Mother's Day and the only thing I can afford is beer and the McDonalds dollar menu. Do you think a Budweiser and a Big Mac says thank you for me fucking up your life since 1990?
when I found u, u were using a t-shirt for pants
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