so heres a good story. about 6 hrs ago i took a bath with bruce blasting. and 6 hrs later i woke up still in my bathtub but in cold water
I accidentally had phone sex last night
I think I left something in your back seat.... It was my integrity
I'm thinking of having one or both of my boobs out. They're small but they're mighty.
Just thought i should tell someone im on the roof, if i pass out up here because no one found me, im behind the chimney
She just invited me to drunkenly make out on the kitchen floor again.....
She's beautiful tan and skinny she will make me hate myself and that's what I need in a friend right now
Pierced my own nipple last night, and yes everyone did go absolutely nuts
I can't imagine anything that has a removal ass flap as being sexy
preface to our conversation: my vagina hurts.
3-9 out of 10... Depends on the situation. Taco Bell is more of an idea than a restaurant.
How stoned are you?
He had a flex off with himself in the mirror but he thought it was someone else for at least 20minutes.
Now I have to go back and sober fuck him. For science.
Fun FACT Saturday: Semen is great for my acid reflux
How did i spend $200 last night?
Every time you went to get me a drink, you also came back with shots. Then you fell down the steps.
Randomize
