We got so high yesterday we tried watching soccer
I'm more concerned as to why he has a playlist entitled Dem Club Beats.
Yes, you did come over last night. You also tried to give my dog a blowjob. You got rejected.
Also, just saw a kid in a gorilla costume being questioned by a boardwalk cop. I love ocean city.
I think it's time we have the "weird fetish" talk.
In case you were wondering...putting everclear into a humidifier DOES get you really really drunk.
I don't know what you told him but please make him stop telling me about his new video camera and winking
I need you to come over. Im crying, day drinking and working out simultaneously.
I was rolling balls and tried to donate blood as an act of kindness to the sick person who would receive it
Yes, I am about to pass out on my beanbag with a mason jar of wine. Welcome to the south freshmen.
walk of shame to my ortho appointment. kids are staring. this little girl just asked her mom if she can havr glitter in her hair too.
Just rinsed and put my styrofoam cup of noodles in the dishwasher. I need to be not hungover ASAP
I feel strange, like something is off with my body
Yeah that's called sobering up, we've been drunk for the past 4 days
Packing a mid day bowl in the Sonic parking lot. Have I gone too stoner?
You got drunk, made toast, and declared yourself a domestic goddess.
Randomize
