If last night was a website it would be called poordecisions.com OR uncircumcisedspanishweiner.org
At the hair cuttery. A father here with his daughter just answered his phone "ken's whorehouse"...Now I remember why I used to pay more for haircuts.
i just stepped in cum. i hate you.
Thats what happens when you don't swallow.
good luck with ur interview. Just show them your confidence and don't make that sucking snot noise. Really don't. Praying for you, love mom
he asked if he could put his cape on while he was still inside me.
My rats are drinking wine. I am drinking with rats. God i am so alone.
It wasn't random sex though, it was almost a relationship, built on lies and sex
I'm taking a leave of absence and sending myself to fat camp. I'll let you know when I'm out.
I've taken a shot every five minutes for the past twenty. His valentines cupcakes are going to be a fucking delicious vodka induced mess. Thinking about putting vodka in this next batch. I'm the best girlfriend.
She offered to treat me to breakfast after a one night stand if I meet her parents and sex again if I act as her bf. It may be a trap but its a offer I won't refuse.
We smoked bowls and watched Cops for what seemed like hours. And yet I know I'll go back.
My only contacts are booty calls or the club hockey team.
I wonder how drunk we can get before Christmas Caroling turns into trespassing.
I'd have to have a ring. Like I don't want to be called "the ex girlfriend that shit on me"
Stop letting me drink while doing my makeup. I think I used sharpie for eyeliner.
Randomize
