"tonights gonna be a goodnight" was blasting at the club while i was screaming "NO ITS NOT" and crying. How do you think it went?
I may have discovered that porn hub is on my top visited sites during class this morning.
cant help it. i get a boner every time that shake weight infomercial comes on
i have a $600 bill for my ER visit in which they did nothing but suggest to me that i am an alcoholic.
Just spent 3 hours on the Mcdonalds website. I don't know what to do with myself now that college is over.
The only way I could have failed my exam worse is if there would have been a drug test portion
We're too lazy too send a pic of out balls. Just assume this is a pic of our balls and respond accordingly.
im almost positive that in mid thrust she told me she was pro choice
you cant just puke in an arbys and not order food. thatd be rude.
i was like his sober eyes girls would come up to us, show us theirs and if approved by me blew him, if rejected they went to my truck with a bottle of patron
I told her my hands were paint brushes and her vagina was my canvas
They used the ice bucket from their room to drink beer from and called it the "Holy Grail"
I haven't taken a solid shit in four weeks. Do you know what started four weeks ago? Alcohol and dining hall food. Fucking college.
Oh man I wish I could've gotten a picture of how many anti-circumcision stickers are on this Prius
Did you finish that presentation yet?
No but don’t worry about it. I do my best work in the middle of the night. I’m like a hamster.
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