just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
We agreed on being friends w/ benefits. Lets see if that really happens.
Ok, so that was not supposed to go to u, my bad. I feel horrible.
There are babies in the room i shouldnt be high with babies in the room.
every time fb tells me a dude i fucked is now friends with another dude ive fucked, i die a little inside. thats way more honesty than im comfortable with.
I can feel the alcohol in my calves
on the way home I asked you what exit we get off at and your answer was "just like the goldfish"
fact: I now appreciate my drunken winter self even more. I just found $20 in my winter coat with a note that says keep yourself warm next winter. I am awesome.
You are right. The scrape marks on her ass are from her breaking the doggy door by crawling through it.
So this 40 year old woman was trying to bring me into the bathroom to blow me and the bartender called the cops on her because she was showing her tits. Only in asbury.
Well we were going to compare notes, but all I could remember was throwing up, and all she could remember was kissing, so then we decided to not compare anything.
I could drive to your house and kick you in the nuts right now....and not even stop for a burrito
I snapchatted him nudes and he didn't screenshot a single one of them because he's a gentleman.
You blew him?!?!
*Am blowing
And I keep taking breaks to write you back, please stop replying.
I already tell everyone in my office my bf is at the Naval academy. It slipped one time and I can't go back on it now
These snow days are takeing a toll on my liver
Randomize
