be a good friend and just tell me i'm not pregnant
FYI angry masturbation is not as cool angry sex
he thinks the dog can do a keg stand. i will let you know how it turns out
If you hook up with your cousin you will permanently be my favorite person ever.
He had seven beers and tap-danced on the table like a pro. HOW DOES HE DO IT
Once you've seen a girl stick a snake in her snatch normal stuff seems like Barney and friends
Well at least the house will be decorated when u get evicted.
You're invited to our X-games themed party. We have an ice luge and every time someone eats shit we drink. It's gonna be great.
if you want to know how my night is going I just ugly cried in the cheesecake factory
NOT ALL OF US HAVE THE HANDS OF GODDAMN ANGELS YOU KNOW
We need to get me chipped asap
The Easter sex puns were too abundant
Pretty sure I was naked for most of the night.....success
My dad accidentally texted me asking if I had weed...
Maybe you should say yes, and you guys can like bond or something...
Well... Chad blew off half of his hand last night. We were able to find most of it.
Randomize
