Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
brass monkey on radio. cant stop dancing.
Kay wants to put chicklets in our cooters to make beavers and take pix captioned Got Wood? Taking public transit does scary things to her.
We just stood on the porch wondering how you managed to puke up a whole piece of bologna
I might have a beer. Just to keep this hangover on its toes.
And really all I wanted was to be like "hey can I borrow your dick for a few hours this weekend?"
I cNt phones. tingles in my fingles. jingles
I'm not drunk because I think my blood just is alcohol from last night so being drunk is sober. If that makes sense
Oh my god did you actually lose a tooth
You don't understand. On her lunch break she sits on the roof, stares into the sky, and chain smokes. I can't get on her level. She is made up of java monsters with whiskey and a voice that sounds like sex.
You need to stop crushing on your boss or fuck her.
When you wake up on the bus on 139th but you're staying at 6th
133 to go
Hey, it's Valentine's Day weekend and were single and off our periods. Let's live like queens.
This is why I only drink in places with a C or D health rating
Is it rude to send him a, "happy birthday, I hope you finally get an STD" text?
Whenever a guy asks me why I like weird sex stuff, I just answer, "Catholic School".
Randomize
