'Watching yourself cry on Photobooth' is the new 'watching yourself cry in the mirror.'
I just lost $50 at the races, got drunk, and woke up to my ex-gf. Apparently the good decisions kept on rolling...
I'm pretty sure if an eight year old calls you a whore.. it's true. just saying.
Is sexting at a funeral morally wrong?
im suggesting it to him. and by suggesting i mean we're not having sex again unless im wearing high heels
I just don't do feelings in the summer months.
I guess I've just seen a lot of penises since then
tanning, a slurpee, and a cigarette. spa day college edition
MY TWIN SISTER IS ENGAGED. I REPEAT, MY SCREW UP OF A SISTER IS ENGAGED. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
I'll be there in 20 with vodka.
I want to wear Christmas sweaters with you.
I don't even remember what he looks like. All I know is he's 6 foot 100. I like that.
No other awkward car ride can beat the one you give your drug dealer home.
and please, if you feel the urge to call me crying tomorrow night, do so. i will be home bored and sober.
I wanna get to the point where I can just send a question mark and get an exclamation point in response
"They won't do it. I'm in the middle of darkness. " and "Probably going to die. I've been walking for 50 minutes in one direction" are the last texts I got from Steve
Randomize
