i'm pissing behind 7/11. if you guys leave... i'll think it's funny too
he's having a long distance Facebook-coordinated power hour. the status update has 159 comments ...
last day of my family cruise we all got trashed and had an award ceremony. I got the award for hooking up with a cougar. my grandma hugged me and said im living up to the legacy. this is why my familys better than yours
you kept going on about how you couldnt haven been the one throwing up because you were peeing in circles.
I tried to say goodbye but you were hugging a trash can and I wasn't sure if you had clothes on
At one point last night I over heard you say " I'm gonna puke in a bag and pour it down your throat" I LOVE YOU.
She was wearing some slutty variation of a toga and giving the entire bus a pep talk on why we should black out tonight...I'M IN LOVE AND I DON'T CARE WHO KNOWS IT!
Send me a pic of your kids to remind me why I have morals.
Got another job?
If by job you mean clever way of getting free tattoos, then yes. I got another job.
He fed us edamame like baby birds. Slowly all coming back to me.
When we were having sex last night, I told him I would replace him with tacos
That moment that random you banged behind the bar is going to be your son's third grade teacher... yup I'm there.
The part where he comes over and ignores you isn't what makes me mad about that story... It's the fact that he ate your tacos, AND THEN proceeded to ignore you. That's cold hearted.
He told me he would make me come so hard I would throw up. I'm actually horrified that he thinks that's something any person would want
First time not coming to this class high in a month and a half, never again will i put myself thru this torture
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