Is it necrophilia if we're both dead?
goodnight i made you a song goodbye
i just saw an asian skipping down the street and it made me think of you
kindergarten is hard when you're hung over.
There was a lot of him and a little penis
The last thing I remember is you asking me how to grow french fries.
Its not gay if you're best friends and there's less than an inch of dick in the picture. That's where the line is drawn
Look, all I can tell ya is I want to drink wine out of a bottle while you eat me. It would be the most fantastic end to finals week. Maybe ever.
So...guess who had sex tied to the ladder of a caboose under the stars in Joshua Tree? This bitch
Dad got stoned the other day and bought us potty training seats for when we have children
well smoking weed has become a deal breaker for me so I pretty much use "let's go smoke a blunt" as an icebreaker
I had sex with him in the back of my car in a duck onesie. I'm worth something dammit.
Uber driver has left leg up on the dash and turn signal on for about a mile, there's Chipotle wrappers on the floor, but she's hot. 5 stars.
Your participation in the democratic process makes me horny AF
I can't believe the MLB is making the NHL look good.
Randomize