He just told me his cousin just died and I look like her. Reconsidering the sex.
The bars here don't close until 4!
my legs don't close until 4
I feel like abortions should bother me more
Anthony wouldn't know good sex if it sat on his face
So i just bought beer on a credit card, using a fake ID, while wearing my nametag from work. All 3 have different names on them. God i love my boobs.
dear roomies, would anyone wanna donate the booze they left in the fridge over break to the "your roomies snowed in and all alone" fund?
What's he like?
The usual. Sarcastic, dark, full of fucked up emotional problems that result in fantastic sexual prowess.
You're so wise. You're like my sexual Grandmother Willow.
You remember the guy that busted in waving a tazer at everyone yelling "get the fuck outta my crib"?
yeah you don't forget that shit easily
We ended up crawling out from our hiding spot and playing pool with him once he calmed down. His name is Marcus. I got his email.
New justification for blow: drug week; 'how it's made'
I can feel my ovaries exploding thinking about them.
for once I'd like a one night stand where I don't meet the guys mom or wife in the morning
I woke up and my pants were in the kitchen but my shoes were next to my bed. Do the math...
You said if the geese can walk on the lake so can I.
Dude. So. Much. Sex. Find a girl in her 30s. Now.
Randomize
