CAN CRIS ANGEL JUST LOOK NORMAL FOR ONCE?!
The plants looked thirsty. Growing plants need mimosas too.
He's sobering up. It was really bad for like 45 minutes. He cried while telling me how he pictured us eating hotdogs on the beach together.
Na Im fine, just need to un-grow this vagina I've developed
I'm mad at him and disappointed with you. It's like I put a bunch of effort into a PowerPoint of "what not to do with Zach" to show you and the first bullet point was "do not love him" and you're just disregarding all my effort and friendship.
I have to make mistakes myself to learn from them
FUCK YOU I AM MAKING A POWERPOINT
I learned so much about myself in that shower.
I spent a lot of time in their kitchen cause I was convinced that the living room was gonna fall... Sorry for not warning you about that.
some how during sex we caught an ENTIRE pillow on fire. A WHOLE PILLOW.
so I may or may not have had intense sex to mozart's greatest hits on vinyl... I don't know if I should be proud or just really disappointed in my nerdness
Yeah I'm just gonna shower and drink a gallon of coffee and drunkenly write my research paper. It'll be fine
He called me saying he got nice rims for his car so now we can fuck in style
i asked my neighbor to open a bottle of vodka once and then we slept together
Can't talk, I'm icing "sorry I barfed on your couch" onto a cookie cake
I realized my soar muscles form the shape of me leaning over a toilet
My alcoholism is old enough to drink.
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