Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
Thanks for jumping on that grenade for me last night. You're the best wingman ever
She ate 7 of the 8 slices of pizza. I deserve a purple heart and sex w your sister
i just saw a girl w/ a shirt that said "im the single friend." yeah i bet u r. stop wearing shirts like that and that could change.
We totally just fucked in a closet. These vacations with his family are causing creativity I never thought I had.
Our local strip club now has karaoke. Do you realize what this could mean for my sex life?
I'm glad you trust me to be your sex stat keeper.
My roommate is trying to suck beer out of the rug.
I'm really starting to miss his dick. Like so much I'm actually tempted to try and work things out with him again.
Just disregard the tooth in the plastic bag in the fridge.
There's a Russian guy here. In the bar. Drinking vodka. Wearing a trench coat and a hat and a mustache. Idk where the confusion is.
end of the world party next friday. virgin sacrifice. tell me you know someone whos still a virgin
It was easier that asking where the vagina platter is.
There's no way you didn't at least start out with a dick. I obviously know there isn't one now, but there is no way that you were born a girl
i spent most of my hangover doing the math to figure out the last of the alcohol would be metabolized from my system.
thank you pre-med degree.
It goes to show, Sane person, daddy doms, little girls, all of us may seem different but deep inside we all grow wisdom teeth
Randomize