Why are you such a perv today?
This is a lot to handle
Oh shh
I'm kidding you prude take a joke
I just made friends with the guy at the coffee shop in borders. And by that I mean he stared at me until I was uncomfortable and left.
If penises could fly, my ass would totally be an airport.
And whoever invented the condom should be put to death.
I just watched a woman break three wood planks with her boobs. I don't know how I feel about that
Is puking blood really that bad of a sign? Can we pretend this is okay?
It's okay.
I slept with him to see his dog one last time
party gras won. party gras always wins.
It was like the perfect storm of bad decisions.
The slot machines are wishing me happy birthday. Mission success.
He also complimented my butt. High praise coming from a boob guy.
I'm glad there seems to be a general consensus regarding your ass
I snuck out of his room and his roommate stopped me to tell me there was a condom stuck to my back
30% sure Kevin and I just adopted a cat. Talk to me when the sun's up but I really feel like that's a thing.
I think that's the first time I had "ass rimming" scroll across my phone at work
What happened last night?
Lets just say you asked me a couple times if you had eyeballs..
Randomize
