I didn't talk to you tonight because I've decided you look like a man.
I CAME AT YOU WITH RAW FEELING
you grabbed my dick through my pants and hissed at me.
Also, just had a student offer to sell me Xanax. Want some? Just for like a rainy day. Or our memorial day shitshow. Or just another Wednesday night.
The pigeons can smell the fear
Wtf
Why does my jaw hurt?
I may have punched you.
The Medal of Honor you banged could be at the inauguration today. You really dropped the ball on keeping up with that one.
Have you ever realized how cool bread is? Like so many things taste good on it. Like its crazy to think that peanut butter and turkey can both taste good on the same thing.
It was awk he was sittin on a plastic backyard chair in his underwear and high white socks in the dark watching the nuggets game
but we were going camping. it only made sense to bring the 6 ft bong
so I guess I made a note in my phone last night to remind myself not to do shrooms on the cruise ship
Your father is wrapped in a table cloth singing, "America Fuck Yeah!" You are missing the time of your life.
While we were having sex he asked me if I wanted to get wingstop after. I think I found my future husband.
My body is telling me there was tequila. My pictures say it was Jeff's fault
I feel like a bottle of fireball rented a bull dozer and ran me over until I was left without a shred of my dignity
I went in for a high five.. He went in for a kiss.. Today is a good day
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