What are these yellow papers in the kitchen?
These are the tickets we got last night.
Did i sign this one as Grizzly Bear?
Yes...yes you did.
I sharted during my first quiz and I couldn't leave, I went ahead and took the rest of the day off.
i just watched my husband get a prostate exam. sex is ruined for me.
the best days in LIFE are when you realize you arent pregnant
i just added no after every hockey player in my phone..
there is beer in every square inch of this apartment and he hasn't even lived in it for 24 hours. we're playing some game that involves slamming beer, beer pong and smacking people's cups out of their hands.
If people don't want my drunken phone call then TAKE YOUR FUCKING NUMER OFF OF FACEBOOK, like it's just that easy...
Afraid I'm about to get arrested. Complicated situation but not a joke. If I do not text again that all is clear within 90 minutes kindly begin bail process. I have the cash to repay as soon as I get home. Details later.
I want to take my head off and cuddle with it
Maybe it will forgive me and stop being an asshole
Hey he's not bad, although he did have a glass eye
We should have a bouncer at the top of our stairs asking the guys we bring home for ID...
I posted her number in the m4m casual encounters area of Craigslist.
I guess her always saying "gay men love me!" will finally get put to the test.
You made noises. And kept meowing. I have a twenty minute phone call to prove it.
test was negative. but nancy drew has yet to solve the case of the missing period.
If work found out I was using THEIR paper to write Karate Kid fanfic I'd never hear the end of it.
Randomize
