Theres puke in my trash can and spilled beer next to my bed... come get your girlfriend
There are 3 speedbumps now up. Think you can manage the urge to piss on them?
Aw shit! That's like putting me a in a room full of Captiain Crunch Donuts and Jasper Hale and not letting me put my mouth on either.
i just watched kanye west and taylor swift have a chugging contest. why cant halloween be every day
you told me heaven would be the 3 of us at Moe's forever and every hot girl that walked in would ask us to play stone face
is 69 when you're sideways or up & down? I was on my back & confused.
She has never blacked out. I have tried to get her to so many times. Apparently it's a lot harder than we make it out to be.
who said I'd never amount to anything...i just won 'most enthusiastic' at my poledancing class
I almost had to get my pinky cut off. Wow I'm so happy. We won beer olympics so i didnt hahaha
Sarah likes to play this game where she leaves her thongs at every party. she hides them where hopefully gf's will find them. I caught her naked from the waste down in my freezer this morning
I cant shower it involves moving...
Just lay there and turn the water on. At least rinse off the shame.
By the way, I'm pretty sure your husband is publicly advocating more BJs for my husband, via Facebook.
i think god would be more upset with me for turning down such a beautifully crafted cock than he would for me liking girls
I have so many feelings about this burrito
I like how I can go from sucking dick in the my basement to singing along to veggie tales with my family in a span of 10 minutes.
Honestly, this social distancing bullshit is giving me a good excuse for drinking alone.
Randomize