Hurry. And bring back up. SHE WON'T STOP TALKING.
Either he has two lazy eyes or he really likes my tits..
new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
It was a rude awakening when I turned on my phone and the first thing I saw was a picture of David's dick with a face on it, I need to stop drinking in his basement...
I made popcorn. Partly so the room doesn't smell like sex, and partly to apologize for the things you saw when you walked in...
Have you ever wondered what your stripper song would be?
In the future let's not drunk dive in the fountain in front of the hotel bar.
JUST SAW MY DRUG DEALER SOBER AND GOING TO CLASS. This is weird, its almost like he's an actual student whio leaves his room...
The vagina on Hilton Head is mighty fine this time of year.
I'm soaked in champagne. I'm eating oatmeal from mcdonalds tonight was glorious
Well, if he didn't want to get caught mid-gay experience by his girlfriend, he shouldn't have pushed so hard to do MDMA with me.
How do you explain to a guy that he's like a little puppy dog that you play with, but then leave at the shelter to go home to your German Shepard?
Great sex, the promise of us mixing our excellent genetics in the future, and access to drugs are mainly what's holding this relationship together at the moment
I made him leave to get me chicken nuggets so I could have sex with his roommate
It got to the point where I was so drunk, playing rock paper scissors as a drinking game seemed like a good idea.
Randomize
