i think i've said "don't judge me" 10+ times tonight... is that a bad thing?
yes
... don't judge me
He's a collector of sorts
Any cool stuff?
You should see the collection of booggers in the carpet next to his desk
were with a gay guy with a minnesota accent. think about how funny that sounds.
good thing vaginas are great cup holders
Just walked by a yard full of girls wearing bikinis. I did my best to stare.
oh dont worry, my liver will give out way before i get skin cancer
Just took the worst coed shower ever. We both cried. AND I only shaved one leg.
I still don't know why you took that job... it sounds miserable
not having any beer money sounds even more miserable
It wasn't really sex. It was just rolling around, trying to make sure his dick didn't end up in my ass.
One my way home. There was too much fog, strobe lights, and cocaine for my taste.
But he does seem to be getting proper humping etiquette down. So there's progress.
Not genetic. He's drunk and texted me a dick pic. Not genetic. Thank God!
If you're ever desperate for a guy's #, ask him to call your lost cell phone so you can find it. Some genius used that on me last night. FML
dude I just found tht weird ass guy u invited last night passed out in my closet.... apparently he "couldn't find the exit"
the hot lifeguard just pulled a McDonald's cheeseburger out of her fanny pack.
Randomize
