I really want to sleep with her friend. I'm hoping our casual sex relationship will somehow lead to that.
i just woke up and "where the fuck is taco bell" was in my search engine...
I took off my clothes and she wanted to have sex. But then she changed her mind. So we ended up fucking through her panties or something. I don't know it was weird.
Wella between the drunkards, the inevitable slutty costumes, and someone doing a BODY SHOT OFF A PREGNANT GIRL, i lost my halloween spirit. Bah humbug.
And nobody saved him?? That chick had like three teeth TOPS
I don't think my body can handle the alcohol I want to put in it anymore.
I really appreciate you zipping up my pants at the bar. You didn't even ruin my Bermuda triangle.
These days, you and me are swimming in dicks.
Marco
Polo
No I got myself stoned. With her bowl. She was just a casualty of the War on Sobriety.
He always takes home straight guys. He plays One Night Stand on Ledgendary Mode
Visiting Houston was a good decision for my penis.
There's a ton of international students in my suite and I'm just sitting in this chair with no pants on eating frosted flakes
Yeah. Got a major ego boost when she said she felt like she had just fucked King Arthur. Buying some donuts later to celebrate with, wanna join?
Specially since he wanted to forget that we even touched, which makes it funnier because I don't think you can take back licking someone's butthole...
Look, all I'm looking for is a good time and someone whose chest I can bury my face in
Randomize
