Why. Ill be the rabbit if ull be the carrot.
she was like a sexier Rosie O'Donnel
All I remember from last night is puking up a box of cheeze-its and the building catching on fire.
yeah my parents were only ten feet away and we somehow managed to do it in five different positions without them noticing
Oh I also wanted to thank you for leaving your list of porn sites on the coffee table. Very entertaining.
no more heavy drinking durning the lady that cleans the office told me i have to emtpy my own thrash if i puke in it
He's so young, I keep getting a mental image of him in footie pajamas. It's cute but it's wrong. Or is it?
Dear, was it your thong we found wrapped around my hairbrush next to Rachel's bed? Please explain.
I'm pretty sure every guy I've been with this weekend has made a solid attempt at getting me pregnant...
It's amazing to think about how many Obama victory sex babies are being prevented by Obamacare free contraception.
I cunt my lip shaving. That's not a typo, it's a placement clue
Check 'smoke weed with our ihop waiter' off of our To-Do List
On Friday, can we drink like its Civil Wars times and the doctor's coming to saw off our gangreen infected legs?
They are going to name an STD after you.
Yeah, I mean I'll probably fuck him regardless but I'm trying to be a lady about it.
Randomize
