So you honestly dont remember putting honey in your bong? You kept talking about how you wanted to become a bee and fly
i woke up convinced that my room was backwards i tried to go into the closet to get outta my room
he told my vagina that he was looking forward to meet it
They thought "watering it down" meant adding more vodka
Well, as a member of the greater american southwest gay community I just have to mark this as a total loss and you will be missed.
Printing the vagina inspector badge was money well spent.
I took a hang over nap infront of the door to my 9am class
Bring the pizza ill bring the boundaries we can cross
I'm still me, I just happen to have things in my porn library that you may not have expected
Only you would come out as bi like that
Definitely just threw up in a mcds cup going through Wendy's drive thru. I'm way to hungover to go to work today
I wanna be like, dude, I peed your bed. Like you laid in my pee. And we're not dating. You can find another fuck buddy who I'm sure won't piss on you.
You tried to tip the Uber driver with a meatball sub. Then, when he refused your meatball sub...you demanded he take you to the corner with the hookers. The valet has your keys and water balloons. I'm glad you're only in Chicago for the weekend.
I'm trying to secure Christmas dick. Idgaf if he has strep or not.
My ex just brought my grandpa weed. Not sure how I feel about this.
Plus he probably didn't want to be at home, alone... Jacking off on the big screen without you there to lend a helping hand. I mean, let's be honest. It's not fun if it's not a little weird.
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