yeh she's definitely getting a ham and plan b omelette in the morning
he asked me out through an event invitation on facebook, the title read Romantic Dinner For 2
taking a shot every time they compare curling to a real sport
Whoever decided putting Tom Seizmore and Heidi Fleiss together in rehab should win some kind of award.
I came home to the cats covered in paint and he was asleep in the tub with a firefighters hat on.
He's 11. You dont draw dicks on 11 year olds, i dont care if he ate your lasagna
Its a Guy he gets weed for. I'm kinda confused as to why there are going to even be tuxedos involved at all.
Its like the two hemispheres of my brain are in a death match but are two evenly matched for either side to win kinda drunk.
Um yeah. I just puked. And found your contact.
I feel like I got hit by a truck. Or a baby dinosaur. One of them ran over my body and then stuck me in a blender of fire and storm clouds
I swear to god, if you fuck the hot one you're paying me back for the shot I just bought her
What? My family got wasted on patron and I threw up on my pants and said it was gravy. Hot mess.
BABE I MISS YOU SO MUCH LIKE THE SADNESS OVERWHELMS BONER ABILITY
Worst case: you're extra horny, have no control of your mouth or actions, and maybe murder someone. Child's play.
If you feel frisky later I have a cowboy hat that would look great on you naked...
Who is this......
Randomize