one might say we're banned from that church
doooooooo herrrrrrrrr
I'm out of practice. be my yoda
put your penis in her you must.
I swear my cock just shook it's head disapprovingly at me.
There are lots of gay asians. This is better than i was expecting
I was handcuffed to a girl for half-an-hour. And I'm still the only one in the house who didn't get laid.
well.. I tried flushing my sandals down the toilet
he's dressed up as pikachu 3 fucking years in a row and gotten laid each time. i don't understand
Best part of being a cop: When I showed up at Thanksgiving with stitches in my head I could tell them I was "protecting and serving" not "drinking and falling down". Career validated.
I like to think I'd be good at dodging genitalia.
She's cute, but batshit. Like some kind of dominatrix disney princess.
So what your saying is I can use her desperation to my advantage. Fuck, this must be how pretty girls feel.
I need a moral compass that doesn't always point to dick
There is a high pitched squealing noise coming from somewhere in my house. I hope it's a gas leak cause I'm over this week man.
Just had a reminder come up that just said "Ham"
Is it bad that I'm not at all bothered by the fact that to some people I'm simply known as the girl that takes her shirt off?
Randomize