Of course we end up in a gay bar... And I have to tell you there are some hot dudes here, should I pass around your Facebook?
ok watching intervention on tv. when i hit rock bottom - i wanna be THIS chick.
i no longer feel bad for not doin my schoolwork. im watching a porn in french. this MUST qualify as studying.
I couldnt bring myself to steal alcohol from my dead grandma
Honestly, I don't care if the only reason she gave me her beer was because she was bisexual and wanted to touch my vagina. Beer is beer.
You started a dance party so that you could steal their vodka and shouted "sailors out!"
I am omw to AA Fellowship by the sea w Jenny and a stripper who just paid for our jetski with 85 $1 bills
i love that feeling when you wake up and have no idea how you got back to your dorm or why you have mac and cheese on your cheeks and eyelashes in your mouth
My living room is scattered with glow sticks wrappers, sparklers, face paint & beer cans?
It's not as cool looking when the drugs wear off, is it?
Needs to be more caveman. "Me kill roommate. You watch. Then sex time with our genitals."
I dont know it just seems wrong to fuck her on my exes back porch
Last year you twerked on my Christmas tree and threw up all over the bathroom...in front of my parents. We should probably keep power hour to ONLY an hour this year
7% of guys ive been with can get me off... I did the math!
I hate him but I love him for what he does which is me
I like shiny stuff tho if that’s an emotion
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