i love marijuana more then i could love a human baby.
dude.. you lit a cigarette on the bus and told the driver it was okay because you were fire marshall of your boy scout troop
Last night you tried to pee on my bed...in the hallway...your room...and the showers. When I finally got you on the toilet you passed out.
We're upstairs smoking....the password is pineapple
I was sleeping on the bathroom floor and thought a wet towel might keep me warm.
I'm a little upset you wasted 3 beers on your wet tee shirt contest.
Our funnel is on top of our neighbors roof.
I'm high and craving hash browns from McDonalds. Please pick me up. I also would like a hug and a supportive pat on the back when you get here. Thanks.
Its two in the afternoon. McDonalds don't sell hash browns at 2 in the afternoon. Whore. The hug I can provide however.
One day her vagina is just going to shrivel up and seal itself with it's self preservation mechanism
I saw Nicolas Cage's face in the moon. Those were good shrooms.
He came over to use the microwave, said he needed to heat up some urine.
In honor of Sarah Palin's bday I suggest we watch Nailing Palin
He may not be fully over his current wife yet. But wait until I show him my tits in his office at the end of the day tonight.
I bought a box of wine on my way home. I figured if I’m going to be broke during the holidays, I might as well be able to drink about it.
There's a Japanese guy here dressed as a Viking who just screamed "wats up cocksluts" and kicked a guy in the face. come get me out of here.
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