Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
You took all of my sister's dolls and threw them out the window and then you started talking to her etcha sketch and mr. potato head. I later found you passed out in front of Toy Story and it all made sense.
We aren't going to mix hockey and sex texts tonight.
I totally agree. all sexting is on hold till after the games over.
Playoffs. This shit is serious.
i walked in and you were spoon feeding your sister grape juice out of a tupperware.
I just banged that chick from the bar by speaking french. all i had to do was recite my grocery list
I'm so eating pot-chocolate cookies while preggers. This kid will be so amazing.
Just stuck all that extra cocaine money we made in a savings account...like a responsible adult..
You blew him?!?!
*Am blowing
And I keep taking breaks to write you back, please stop replying.
I have a 30 minute video visit blind date tonight with a guy in prison. And it's costing me $9. ROCK... BOTTOM...
I need to reevaluate my stance on weekday hangovers...
Your vagina is not a steamboat from the 1800's
i'm not so sure everythign we did last night was legal...
Sorry I blacked out in bed
it was real late and you were brushing your teeth with miller light. it was bound to happen.
Dude, someone puked in my washing machine last night, I tried turning it on to clean it...not a good idea
It's a weird kind of sexy when a guy has a bunkbed with his roommate
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