YOU GOT EVICTED FROM A TRAILER PARK!?!? WTF!!!!!
I'm not saying he's gay. Just that he prob knows what a dick tastes like
So I put about 15 worms in the cuervo bottle. I don't think that's how it works but I feel like hallucinating by 11am
Who would have guessed that on my moms birthday she'd have sex with the door open. :(
i no longer feel bad for not doin my schoolwork. im watching a porn in french. this MUST qualify as studying.
Someone shattered a urinal.
When I told her that her boyfriend was making out with another chick, all she said was "which one"
uhh when the x-ray tec was moving your head you licked his hand and meowed.. i think he knew you weren't sober
You know its good night when theres makeup smears on the toilet seat
You grinded on me in Jimmy johns to a madonna song.
When you were bringing him upstairs I told him to bring you on down to pound town. you're welcome.
I woke up in some kids room and he introduced me to his friends at breakfast as "Monica" so I just went with it.
I think clothing becomes optional at the second date! But you seem like a rule breaker
How did the surgery go?
My face feels like a marshmallow.
I woke up with your bra on, and some guys boxers. I'm in a random truck, in the middle of nowhere...
Randomize
