oral is when you put your mouth on someones privates and play moterboat or popsicle
Let's create a 16 and pregnant drinking game
Dude dan is so baked he taped his remote to the futon so he couldn't lose it again. Come over here
I wanna tell red shirt guy I'm pregnant and use the abortion money for Coachella.
it's like i can feel the ghost of his dick still inside me
Jenna and Ryan are ranting and raving about child custody. MY VASECTOMY SMILES.
Pretty sure I saw a dude across the room give this girl the international hand gesture for "I'm going to fist you later", she seemed ok with it.
In your defense, I really thought capturing that alligator would have been a lot more awesome and a lot less tragic.
RIP Mr Bojangles.
Finished sriting an apology letter to my liver 2 weeks before st. Patricks game on
We were messing around at his place it was going fine until he said, "I'm going to cum, hand me the shot glass"
I left the guinea pigs on the dryer. Make sure to take care of them.
There's a time and a place for everything. Except for getting wasted at a work event, puking in the parking lot, and sleeping in your car overnight.
It's been a long time since I got "Talk about Glen's enormous penis" drunk
is buying liquor on my lunch break too aggressive?
i'm eating chex mix in the shower while texting. i feel accomplished.
Randomize
